The Legend of Zelda series has delighted children, entertained adults, and intrigued fans for years. For many people, the series not only provides a place to get away, but also acts as a source of debate and mystery for fans everywhere. Articles can be found trying to explain some of the most perplexing timeline questions the game has to offer. Theories of how the games connect, to Link and Zelda’s relationship have spawned innumerable articles and questions that fans have been quite willing to go in-depth into, order to explain.

For me however, only one pressing question remains at the foremost of my thoughts.

At what point does mild irritation become raving insanity?

I ponder this question at 2 am in the morning, playing once again through one of the most hated and difficult dungeons in the Zelda world.

The Great Bay Temple.

Oh, please allow me to introduce myself. My name is Darth Citrus and welcome to this edition of A Somewhat Serious Article, a series that I created on my site Exploding Deku Nut, and hope to continue here at Zelda Blog.

If you’re looking for something serious don’t wouldn’t bother reading any further. The issues that I look at are not important ones. Rather, my line of articles raise questions more along the line of, “Why does Link only get ONE power glove in LTTP?” or “How come no one ever uses Deku Nuts?

Thus issue I would like to talk about today is of equal importance: WATER THEMED DUNGEONS

Or temples, I’m not that picky about it. After all, Link had to go though Jabu Jabu’s Belly for crying out loud.

But where was I? Ah yes Water Themed Dungeons.

I personally am not a fan of anything water themed. I rarely drink water and living in the desert isn’t that bad. But again I am no stranger to the Zelda series as well. You would think after playing each game 3 times, I could breeze through the Great Bay Temple with my eyes closed.

Wrong.

Great Bay Temple has some really good music. A really unique layout and some really cool machinery. But the complexity, backtracking, and of course that stupid fish at the end of the whole thing is enough to make anyone tear their hair out.

The Great Bay Temple is not the only water based dungeon that’s drove people insane. For many fans, it’s the dreaded Water Temple from Ocarina of Time. The sheer size of it was enough to make anyone confused. When you add the extra feature of a three tiered water level system, you have yourself hours of stumbling your way through endless maze corridors and fighting the odd like-like that can somehow survive underwater.

I’m sure everyone has felt irritated at some point with a Water Based Dungeon. Jabu Jabu’s Belly, The Water Temple, Great Bay Temple, Jabu Jabu’s Belly AGAIN (from Oracle of Ages) or the Temple of Droplets from the Minish Cap. I wouldn’t have added this last one were it not for the fact you have to fight an octorock while you’re the size of a peanut.

But in all seriousness, why is it that the Water Based Dungeons take the longest to complete? Swimming aside, just finding your way around them is hard enough, never mind searching 3 floors with a fine toothed comb, just to find a single key. I find that they also have the hardest bosses you’ll find in the entire game. Morpha, Gyorg and that stupid Octorock was much harder to beat than the final boss. And it often took several tries as well.

3 am . I should probably be sleeping soon. However, seeing as one can’t save unless they are willing to go back to day one and start over, it looks like I’ll be up for another hour or two. I sit back, rubbing my eyes, frustration setting in. I take comfort knowing that I certainly can’t be the only one frustrated over these things. And if I am, excuse me while I curl into a ball and cry for the next 6 or 7 hours.

We can only wait to see what sorts of traps and challenges Twilight Princess will bring. If there’s a Water Based Dungeon in there I’m sure I’ll be missing another night’s sleep, as well as a late term paper, but only time will tell.

I’m sure by now many of you are sitting back, scratching your heads, and wondering what the point of this article; besides that Water Based Dungeons are annoying. There is none. And that’s what makes it, A Somewhat Serious Article.

Filed under A.S.S.A., Humor